Happy New Year!
As we close out this year and start a new one I felt the urge to write a post about this past year. It hasn’t been kind to me and it’s my own fault.
I keep falling back into old habits of trusting the same people and even though they have proven time and time again that they can’t be trusted I keep doing it.
You might be wondering why because I am too. It’s not like I can’t take care of myself I mean my husband was in jail for 3 months and I was on my own for the first time ever with 2 kid’s no less, but I did it and it turns out it’s not as bad as I thought.
Am I having trouble doing things for myself because I’m so introverted? Who knows, but one thing I do know is that I hate driving and new things, and it’s so bad that I will procrastinate anything until it can’t be ignored anymore and it has become a real problem in my life.
I have multiple health issues going on right now but I’m having problems adjusting to my new doctor and I’ve only been once. I’ve been breaking out in hives for some unknown reason and I have a lump on my stomach. All of this needs to be dealt with along with the fact I have to get blood work done too that I seem to have trouble with also.
So in light of the new year my resolution is to stop being scared of new things and get this stuff done so I don’t die prematurely leaving my kids behind wondering where everything went so wrong.
I am so hoping that any introverts that read this can help me with my problems of getting out and not being scared, especially about driving in the crowded cities.
What If My Husband Dies?
This is something I’ve been thinking about since yesterday. The reason is because I’ve been seeing these posts on Facebook about repost this if you know someone who has fought cancer and died or survived. Here’s the one I posted.
May be my last post for awhile……love you all!
Certainly, in the most difficult moments of life you realize who are true friends or the people who really appreciate you 😊 Unfortunately, some friends will click on “like” but in reality they do not take time to read your status if they see it’s lengthy.
Now I’m watching the ones who will have time to read this post until the end. This is a little test just to see who reads, and who shares without reading.
If you have read everything so far, select “like” so I can put a thank you in your profile. Cancer is very invasive and destructive to our body, even after the end of the treatment, your body is still fighting with yourself trying to reconstruct all the damage caused by radiation. It’s a very long process.
Please, in honor of a family member or a friend who died, or is still fighting cancer, or even had cancer but it’s healed; copy and paste (not share) in your page.
So I will know who read my status 😍, please write “done” in the comments. Thank you for this opportunity to share this with you for those people and Loved one’s that fought toe to toe, time for cancer to go be gone..
Love you all.
Positive vibes and energy to you all!!
That’s only one variation though. I saw another one that started out like this:
This won’t be my last post but it will be the last one for a while of significance.
I don’t want to post anymore because my mind is in a dark and depressing place because of this.
I’ve been thinking about this more now than before because my dad died from bone cancer when my mom was 51, I’m 46, scary right? The only difference is that my dad was 60 when he died. My husband as of today is 49, still though he died when my mom was 51.
I keep thinking, Am I ready for life on my own? The answer is if my husband was to die today I would have to be. I would have to learn how to handle myself in stressful situations, situations I use to avoid and let my husband take care of because he was just better at it than me.
I have a tendency to panic when I’m in unfamiliar situations like driving in new places. The problem is panicking in a car can get people killed. That is something I want to avoid but I don’t know how. I’m also unsure of how to get help to learn how to cope in life when my partner is no longer around.
If anyone reading this knows how to help me please comment below, it will be greatly appreciated.
I’m An Introvert
Yes, I know, crazy right? Why would an introvert start a business that requires socializing?
Well believe or not we thrive online. Why? Because we get to choose when we socialize online. We are able to block people who make us mad or just won’t stop asking questions.
Believe me I have blocked a lot of people for that very reason. You can’t block people in the real world which is a bummer to us but we remedy that by just not meeting in the real world because that’s just too scary.
I have turned down so many invitations that people have just stopped inviting me to their gettogethers. (or at least that’s what I tell myself)
Although the real reason could be because I’m extremely rude. I don’t mean to be though. I also have a ad habit of not bringing anything to the party. I always used the excuse “I don’t have the money” but the real reason is that I’m not a good gift giver, I never have been AND because of being an introvert I’m too afraid to ask what I should bring. Just thinking about starting a conversation causes a panic attack.
I also have a tendency to have major breakdowns if I don’t get alone time or quiet time. I’m talking about getting angry and yelling at people when they have been talking for longer than I would like or just not going to bed when I want them to.
That brings me to what’s going on right now. I have gotten my days and nights mixed up because that’s the only time I get peace and quiet. I don’t think I will get them straightened out anytime soon either, but I hope I will, although at this point I prefer it when everyone is asleep.
Are you introverted, extroverted or ambiverted? Let me know in the comments.
Also if you enjoyed reading this please comment, like and share.
Mary’s Biz, LLC
No Arguing In Front Of The Kids!
Well that’s what everyone says anyway but does anyone even follow that really? I mean I know that we definitely should because of our son and if you’ve read any of my blog posts you know that our son is schizophrenic. If not here is one of the posts about that.
The Kids Went Trick Or Treating Last Night
So anyway yesterday me and my husband got into an argument over our usual stupidness with me yelling at him and getting all angry and in turn yelling at the kids. Now I know that I shouldn’t have taken it out on them but sometimes that happens.
As usual our son couldn’t handle it and the voices got worse to the point that he had a panic attack. His said his eyes were rolling into the back of his head, he couldn’t breathe and he wasn’t able to sit still. I called his therapist but he was so agitated that he wouldn’t talk to her.
He was just screaming for me to hang up. He never did talk to her but after a while of the house being quiet he finally went to sleep and stayed asleep. Luckily his therapist is coming by today for a session with him and his sister and all will be well.
Thanks for reading and if you enjoyed it please like, share and comment.
Owner Mary’s Biz, LLC
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